Sunday, November 23, 2008

What is your Passion?

I have to admit this year has gotta be the most eventful year of my life. I have somewhat learnt what is good about me at the same time learnt the bad side of me (well mostly the bad side). But what really made me decide to blog about this is most probably the 2 mangas, Suzuka and Ichigo 100%. Yeah I know you’ll probably be saying that I’m Ecchi or something. But truthfully it made me realise something when you have reached a crossroads would you choose love or your passion. I have to admit I sort of chose both; love first for a while then passion, but the ending was the same as I had imagined it to be. But sometimes I wonder if I had chosen my passion first would you still be there when I came back?

But if I choose love, what is it actually? I may not know what it is but I do not think not being able to remember her name, birthday and interests is called love. But that is what I’ve been doing all this time. During the time I was with her I did not ask her how she was feeling, how was her day, what did she like. I realised all those things I knew about her was because she kept on telling me about herself without prompting. Hahas oh and I remembered my first date with a gal (not her) I actually asked her if I could hold her hand (LOLS Major peiseh). Well yeah but I did not last.

From the Manga Ichigo 100% there was this gal who would throw herself at the main character daily even though they were not together, and when she asked him this question “What will you do if I were to disappear one day?” and it turned out she was gonna migrate to France (well later the trip was cancelled but you get the idea) it really struck home. This was the probably the moment I could relate to the character, sometimes when you have gotten used to someone so much, you take it for granted and when she is gonna leave you then you feel that there are so many things you still have not done with her, places to go, sites to see.

Well back to the topic of this year I really learnt alot about myself, and sometimes wonder why am I studying in Business studies, hahas I have like how should I put it...lost interest in my studies. I do not deny that what I have learnt the past 3 years are useful and I’ll definitely put it to good use in the future. But I know that I do not want to go to the University, why would someone who has already decided what he wants with his life waste away another 2 years of his life. To me the wages of a job does not matter, as long as I am able to spend every day having fun and loving what I do and return home looking forward to the next day. I used to feel that way in school, but I feel like I’m distancing myself from my classmates and stuff. Hahas sometimes I feel like dropping everything and just run of somewhere to cool my head off, but even if I hop on a train the furthest I can go to is vivo (LOLS), and to me that is not enough. I wanna see the world and experience everything firsthand, I wanna just lay back on some open field and watch as the wind makes the long grass sway. There are lots of things I wanna do some might happen some might not...Bleah btw I can’t believe I just typed out all those things.

Hiax so the question still stands.... Passion or Love

Friday, November 21, 2008

HOP nite and other stuff

Yeah back to blogging, just came back from the red camp hop night. Lols it was the first time I actually did a cipher with a dance style that did not just include B-boy hahas. Was one of the lucky few (together with some other NRA mates) that managed to get in the convention centre as the hop nite was strictly “red campers only.”

Other than that, the guys training is now like every day of the week except for wed, sat and sun. However sun we have mass freshies item and my ankle has not yet recovered from the incident 2 weeks ago.

Oh yeah and then tomorrow I’ll going for reggaes’ open class at O school with a friend from BA-comm. Hopefully I can survive it hahas.

And lastly the one thing I wanna rant about is that my data gathering call is on mon and I have not prepared yet (the horror!!!). yeah so anyone that has tips please tell me hahas. Yeah thats pretty much how I’ll spend my weekend this week, dunno if I have time for other things... hiax.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Bleah

Hiax... it seems like I only blog when I’m depress, thats when i start talking to myself.
I dunno why, but i feel like recently i dun really give a fuck about whats going on around me and stuff. i mean like why the fk should i bother bout other ppls business anymore? Its kinda f-ed up and stuff coz of certain matters (helping works: b-day cake, hols) for those who understand... yeah well gd for u.

one thing i realise is that i tend to try to please others (with gd intentions) in a way but then somehow i feel like i get stuck with the shittiest job. So now all i'm sorta looking forward to is the end of this freaking sem. there are a few things i'd be glad to see the back of and seriously this is one of it. (ok i'm like rattling of somewhere, for those who do not understand bear with me thnks)

ok the depression section is over, on a lighter note Danzation is coming up and WTF freshies guys have training every weekday form 5-7pm till god noes when.
oh and a very nice poem i found while reading a book in the library

I didn't get a standing ovation today.
But i learned afterwards a woman in the front row with cancer
nodded in agreement as I spoke of overcoming a circumstance.

I didn't get a standing ovation a week ago.
But a small group stayed late after the program.
They bought the beer and we shared great stories.

I didn't get a standing ovation a month ago.
But a manager from that program sent me a note.
He said my presentation encouraged him to keep trying.

I did get a standing ovation recently.
I gave a pretty good speech, but after the applause
i don't remember much else that was remarkable that day.

I didn't get a standing ovation today.
Instead, i somehow connected with the human spirit.


Its a bloodly good poem. Try to understand it, it does not apply to just speakers but everyone.
Damn i'll getting soft...